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Particularly shameful are the sex scenes, where the "This Is A Beautiful And Tender Moment" music goes hand in hand with the aesthetic choice to produce something truly laughable, and the scene in the temple of Andraste, where a trial of faith specifically demand everyone strips naked to approach, only to decide "No, no, you're alright. These fashion disasters pour hommes et pour femmes present poor choices of nigh legendary status, particularly in the case of Morrigan, for somehow ending up more covered up when she takes her top off. As if that wasn't a poor enough showing, the first Dragon Age really begs questions of how BioWare ever developed its reputation as one of the best RPG developers in the world. This is a fine sliver of extra pervy detail, even if it cannot quite compensate for no passers-by ever pausing to wryly comment "I find your lack of trousers disturbing." You'd think one of them would, between praising Revan. Bonus points however do go to the first game, with Bastila swapping out her initial bra and pants for a little black number according to whether she's most recently been wearing a Dark or Light Robe and thus has been feeling naughty recently. Knights of the Old Republic II fixes this, though at the cost of an entire level spent running around in brown underwear so unflattering that even Atton Rand seems to be forcing himself to comment if rescued by a female character, as if grateful not to be staring at what Kreia's packing under her robe. As George Lucas once infamously told Carrie Fisher, there are no bras in space! Blatant canon violation! For shame, Bioware! Right from the start, we have a problem - a certain. Pants Rating: 7/10 Knights of the Old Republic At least, not while he's still in earshot. This seems fair enough though, given that his mutant heritage tends to be enough to earn their scorn anyway, and it could be argued that seeing all the scars offers a fairly good reason not to push things any further. Neither guards nor civilians seem particularly put out by Geralt's ventures into half-naked Witchering. Geralt's choice of boxers instead of briefs seems fitting for a Witcher on the go, being kept scrupulously clean for the many ladies who get to see them as part of a normal week, as well as airy and made of what looks to be a fine cotton weave to prevent the boys just becoming festering sweat-balls capable of repelling monsters better than the Quen sign. How does the subjective best RPG of the year fare in this objective test? A reasonable, yet limited success, it must be said. This week then, a random sample will answer the question the world has been waiting to realise it should have asked - objectively speaking, which RPG is the best? Specifically, if they all forgot their PE kits and had to go quest in their pants. (To be clear, it's very rarely even close to sexy.) Some would call it a secret test of a game's devotion to world simulation - that if characters react, it says good things about the developers' devotion to detail. Since the dawn of RPGs, two things have remained constant: heroes require armour, and players will always want to find out what happens if they strip it all off and run around.